Wednesday, June 29, 2011

First Impressions

As many writers will attest, the most difficult part of the process is staring at a blank page. At that very moment, anything is possible. But as soon as you commit to that first letter, whatever you are writing begins to take on a life of its own. Lately I've been writing long hand in little notebooks because it's amazing how many good ideas are swallowed by a simple key stoke. What seems stupid one day might seem genius the next. I shudder to think how many plays I've "cut and deleted" over the years. My most recent play started with a line that I would have never remembered had I not written it down in my notebook. Which got me to thinking of the first lines that have inspired me over the years...

Attention detention!
Oh, the mutiny.
Come on in, but don't fall in the hole.
Would you like more potatoes?
Lights, please.
Excuse me.
Computers for dummies.
What the hell is going on out here?
Yes?
Holy mother of god.
Ta da!
My name is Michael and this is the story of my life.
Can you believe it?
Before Jerry Maguire said "show me the money."
Becky will be with you in just a moment to take your order.
Even the hot fudge is incredible!
Next, please.
Ahoy!
Come on, Grandma, let's go.
Good morning, Miss Eliot.
It's just like the opening scene of Oklahoma! out here.
Split ends?
My back is to the world.
Have you ever had one of those days?
I woke up this morning, sick as a dog.
Just wait until you taste Grandma's tomato sauce!
Is it over?
He loves me.
How did we end up in bed together?
Oops!
That's my yogurt.
How long until the hot dogs are ready?
I am uninterested in the world.
I'm sixteen so I'm not allowed to have an opinion.
Hurry!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

They Say...

I am excited to have added a new play to my website! This crowd pleasing comedy is perfect for all age groups!

THEY SAY...

Genre: Comedy
Cast: 2w, 3m
Running Time: 30 minutes
Setting: One exterior

Synopsis: They say you should never swim on a full stomach. They say you should never talk to strangers. They say you should never say never. Who exactly are they? And who the hell do they think they are? This is the story of Martin and Gloria They, two know-it-alls who move in next door to Joe and Betty Griffin. They instantly begin telling the Griffins what to do and their harassment quickly escalates into sheer pandemonium. These windbags think they have the answer to everything, but Joe and Betty aren't as dumb as they look and have a few opinions of their own!

Please visit www.bradleyhayward.com and follow the links to read a preview!

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Reading Room: The Absolutely Insidious and Utterly Terrifying Truth About Cat Hair

Anyone looking for a hilarious, theatrical, crazy, wacky, thoughtful, intelligent, bizarre, inspiring one act play need not look any further. I had the enormous pleasure of reading a new play by another writer named Bradley...Bradley Walton. That play is The Absolutely Insidious and Utterly Terrifying Truth About Cat Hair (best title ever!) and I beg you to click on over to Theatrefolk and order yourself a reading copy NOW. I promise you will have a million ideas about how to stage it before you even turn to the second page. It could be produced by students of any age or experience, with budgets large or small, and will undoubtedly have your audience in stitches. I wish I could be whisked back to high school just to have the chance to act in this play, although I think it would also make a great piece for adults. Hmm...now I'm getting ideas here. I'm more of a dog person myself, but cats are where it's at in this play, and I was happy to find myself buried in a heap of cat hair in exchange for 30 pages of awesome!

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

Split

I am thrilled to announce that Theatrefolk has accepted Split for publication! Scripts should be available later this summer or early fall. Stay tuned!

SYNOPSIS: Children of divorce are united through humor in this honest and theatrical look at the day to day reality of growing up in a family that's been torn apart. As these teenagers navigate a winding road that includes new bedrooms, new siblings and new responsibilities, they begin to put the pieces of their broken homes back together. Realizing they are not alone, they bravely come together and summon the courage it takes to believe in love all over again.